...while wondering what ever happened to Santa Claus

People. What the hell?!? Now every year we go on our, “if you’re at a parade in December and there’s a fat guy in red, you’re at a Christmas parade”, rant. This is not that rant. And although we think it’s just being childish to protest Christmas, we do understand the point of those opposed to Christmas parades/decorations/sanctioning by a public entity, when not everyone is a Christian. We get that. We just think there are more important misuses of tax dollars to be concerned about. But as we said, this is not that rant. (hard to tell, we know; but we digress). No, this is about Lowes, winner of the Idiot(s) of the Week award. They are not selling Christmas trees this year. They are selling “holiday” trees. Yeah, that holiday is Christmas! I mean, come on. If you buy a tree in late November/early December, put lights, garland/tinsel, ornaments, shove it up an angel’s ass (or even if you put a star atop), then take it down shortly after the 25th of December – dude, you have a Christmas tree. This is political-correction taken to a ridiculous level. The only people who buy Christmas trees are people who celebrate Christmas. Even if they do not recognize the religious aspect of it, they celebrate the secular holiday it has become. Sow how in the hell could you possibly offend anyone by calling it a Christmas tree? And in an impressive feat, they get the Hypocrite(s) of the Week award, also, for selling "Christmas" trees to Hispanics, but "holiday" trees to the rest of us, as evidenced here...Big BIG props to New Jersey! We give the Garden State much grief for its environmental, “issues”, running through governors like the Spears family does EPT's and the disproportionately-large number of Idiots of the Week we find there, particularly amongst their legislature. But right there is where we give kudos, for New Jersey this week abolished the state-sanctioned murder of its prisoners, finally realizing that the death penalty as currently structured is not a deterrent, costs more than imprisoning someone for life, has been applied in error, resulting in the death of truly innocent inmates and is disproportionately applied as regards gender (male) and race (black). We find it ironic that the guy who is responsible for, “Megan’s Law”, ends up leaving death row because of this and we do feel bad for the family of the victim, but the statement that it sends is the right one. We hope more states follow suit…Our beloved Browns are on the precipice of returning to the NFL playoffs for the first time since returning to the league, and the Ravens were the first team to lose to the 0-13 Dolphins. The pigskin gods were good to us this week…Quote of the week goes to Pete Rose, commenting on the Mitchell Report, “I never thought that anybody would make me look like an altar boy.” That’s a disturbing image, Pete kneeling there during the consecration, whispering to the altar boy next to him, “I got a quarter says he turns it into blood!”…So Texas has cleared the final hurdle to charging a $5.00 cover charge at topless joints, with the money going to rape counseling centers. Because going to a strip club makes you a rapist? Now, we don’t frequent those places – seriously. It’s just not our thing. But c’mon. What’s next, charging a $10.00 cover charge to get into a middle school with the funds going to crack rehab centers?...So Mamma Spears has cancelled plans for her book on parenting. Don’t suppose it has anything to do with her 16 year-old daughter (Jamie Lynn) getting knocked up, or the train wreck that is Britney, do ya? Actually, we think she should go the OJ route and release the book anyway. She could call it, “Good Parenting – If I Did It”…We’re going to cut this edition short, as we need to go out and pick up a few “holiday candelabras”. They used to be called Menorahs.
Until next time,
Paz